So, on the 3rd of April, @MaxPowerMD was sent a threatening email by webmaster@greenpeaceusa.org.
Here’s how it starts:
Date: Fri, 3 Apr 2009 14:55:37 -0400
From: webmaster@greenpeaceusa.org
To: @MaxPowerMD
Subject: 36 Days Left to Save the Polar Bear!
Dear The All Mighty Max,
Greenpeace polar bears
36 days | 2 hours | 10 minutes
Time is running out! If you don’t take action before this countdown hits zero, it will be too late.
These are how hostage negotiations begin – at least on TV.
I talked to Max about this ordeal because I was concerned. But in off-camera John Wayne fashion, Max simply looked up from his screen and said, “I already gave Greenpeace money this year. If the Polar Bears die, fuck it.”
That’s right, Fuck it!
Greenpeace, listen closely! We do not negotiate with hostile threats and we will not bend to your will. The fate of those poor innocent polar bears lie in your hands, not ours. If the Polar Bears were in our position, they would feel much the same way.
And because of your actions, you have failed because now the polar bears will be able to die with a sense of purpose. They will die for a good cause. Their cause will be righteous and we will salute them because they will have passed on for the cause of FREEDOM.
Fuckin’ freedom, you tree-huggin’ hippies. Those defenseless predators will have lived their final moments free from oppression, free from your extremist ways. Their final memories will not be of your vindictive snickering or your weapons of their mass destruction but of that final baby seal they clubbed with their hands and feasted upon before the great white shark could devour them both.
You don’t Fuck the circle of life!
There are 10 days left before you precious non-working countdown is up. The next move will be yours. I suggest you come up with a new strategy if your ultimate goal, as you claim, is to save these poor innocent creatures.
If you want us to sign your petition to rescind some not-so-fair animal rights policies, then I suggest you ask us nicely.
You have to ask us nicely.
You see, Greenpeace, we can handle the unshavened girls and the vegetarian diets. We don’t want your tokes and we don’t want a hybrid. What we do want is for you to stand their in your liberal-ass Birkenstocks and with your Berkeley mouth, extend us some fuckin’ courtesy.
You gotta ask us nicely.
Anyway – if you’re into saving Polar Bears and don’t want them carved up like Han Solo’s Tauntaun, then click this Greenpeace petition hippie link.
C-HO Mesothelioma Rating: 3 out of 10.
For no other reason than the fact it was lame. If Greenpeace want to generate positive attention, get the agency who does the ads for FreeCreditReport.com.
