Yahoo! …Still Sucking as Hard as Ever

Posted on | September 3, 2009 | No Comments

At some point in the past (4 days ago), I may have mentioned the ass-suckingly awful qualities of Yahoo!
Well, the Yahoo! “top stories” have noticed, and decided to offer me additional evidence to support my theory that Yahoo! is quickly becoming the infected asshole of the internet.
I present: Why Michelle Obama’s Hair Matters

The title alone smacks me in the face with retarded asshole logic. First, Michelle Obama’s hair doesn’t matter at all in any relevant way. She’s a woman who has hair and what she does with it rates on my “importance scale” somewhere between Billy Likes Soda and Miss Lippy’s Car is Green.*

Do you want to know what I want from the First Lady? Not a god damn thing. If possible, I’d prefer that she’s not a babbling asshole who devises retarded plans for fighting the “War on Drugs” (fuck you, Nancy Reagan, you worthless bitch), but ultimately she has no authority or responsibilities in our government, so I don’t care.
If Mrs. Obama wants to give a speech about race relations or concepts of beauty in America, I’ll watch. If she has something relevant to say about any issue affecting my life of the life of anyone else I know, I’ll listen. But if a bunch of assholes want to ignore those things and instead whine about the social implications of her hairstyle, I want to set their damn heads on fire.
Yahoo! obviously isn’t the only outlet for these idiotic discussions, but Yahoo! is the one the pisses me off today, so screw ‘em.

Yahoo!, you’ve reminded me again how much you suck.

C-HO Mesothelioma Rating – 8.5 – Yahoo! is still a portal for millions of internet users, many of whom are stupid and easily influenced. Constantly showering them with idiocy and glossing over anything important is a key factor in leading us toward the entirely plausible future depicted in the movie Idiocracy

*Billy Madison has been on cable a lot lately. Next week I’ll probably have Teen Wolf references.

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